Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
