he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
