dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize