covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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