I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
