we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I have peed in a lot of sinks
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
