I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
