Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
