It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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