Barsexuality is the new black.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
