Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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