Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize