i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
