Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
