you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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