I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
