I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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