And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
