so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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