I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
