no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
