Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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