He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
My first STD was from a foam party
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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