you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize