Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
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