You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize