I have demons in me.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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