You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
