I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Randomize
