Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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