I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
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i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
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He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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