You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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