Texts From Last Night

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  (209): View more from California

  yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.

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  (209): yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room. http://tfl.nu/6bc3
  Replies (6) Good night (606) Bad night (3550)
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  (619): View more from California

  He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.

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  (619): He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting. http://tfl.nu/l79o
  Replies (58) Good night (853) Bad night (3654)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs

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  (502): And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs http://tfl.nu/2r8e
  Replies (41) Good night (861) Bad night (3445)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.

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  (812): They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban. http://tfl.nu/cwx8
  Replies (8) Good night (4575) Bad night (990)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?

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  (703): What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'? http://tfl.nu/3ece
  Replies (12) Good night (2332) Bad night (1018)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone

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  (480): oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone http://tfl.nu/6uha
  Replies (5) Good night (2000) Bad night (779)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.

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  (813): she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by. http://tfl.nu/df84
  Replies (5) Good night (1328) Bad night (1042)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.

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  (904): its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go. http://tfl.nu/zvzo
  Replies (14) Good night (471) Bad night (1319)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.

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  (208): Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me. http://tfl.nu/44ip
  Replies (8) Good night (1365) Bad night (475)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk

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  (847): being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk http://tfl.nu/qiyf
  Replies (6) Good night (968) Bad night (437)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad

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  (978): Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad http://tfl.nu/d7yn
  Replies (6) Good night (1432) Bad night (392)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker

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  (703): The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker http://tfl.nu/7qsu
  Replies (6) Good night (624) Bad night (319)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  He yearns for your heart.

  (678): View more from Georgia

  He needs to stop being a pussy about it.

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  (404): He yearns for your heart. (678): He needs to stop being a pussy about it. http://tfl.nu/dh98
  Replies (2) Good night (667) Bad night (182)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun

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  (270): I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun http://tfl.nu/24f6
  Replies (2) Good night (540) Bad night (180)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know

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  (434): Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know http://tfl.nu/qpk5
  Replies (2) Good night (271) Bad night (719)

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