in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.