Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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