well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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