Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT? http://tfl.nu/zjw1
  Replies (28) Good night (661) Bad night (1972)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link http://tfl.nu/gvkq
  Replies (9) Good night (851) Bad night (1953)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault. http://tfl.nu/nhl8
  Replies (14) Good night (2803) Bad night (1063)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"

  (305): View more from Florida

  does that mean he doesn't last long?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon" (305): does that mean he doesn't last long? http://tfl.nu/k8bo
  Replies (10) Good night (817) Bad night (3668)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!' http://tfl.nu/twcd
  Replies (28) Good night (7545) Bad night (758)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me http://tfl.nu/jfl6
  Replies (65) Good night (2073) Bad night (12404)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions. http://tfl.nu/pgpr
  Replies (16) Good night (5911) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (361): I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about? http://tfl.nu/lnao
  Replies (15) Good night (4435) Bad night (1282)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy http://tfl.nu/r472
  Replies (11) Good night (4462) Bad night (823)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups http://tfl.nu/8ph5
  Replies (13) Good night (6256) Bad night (891)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america http://tfl.nu/rqmz
  Replies (9) Good night (1601) Bad night (2239)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher http://tfl.nu/j0wm
  Replies (3) Good night (1612) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.

  (1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

  10 points to you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture. (1-717): 10 points to you http://tfl.nu/7e2v
  Replies (8) Good night (2123) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever http://tfl.nu/x5gy
  Replies (2) Good night (303) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  ...it's a 9am class...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer? (505): ...it's a 9am class... http://tfl.nu/7p5a
  Replies (2) Good night (550) Bad night (251)

Randomize