I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
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She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
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Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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