The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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