Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
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