We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Plural? Please tell.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
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We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
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Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.