is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
