my vag is so smooth its legendary
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
