it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
