the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
