i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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