my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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