Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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