i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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