I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
